Zig Zags

I love to run in road races.

I have a clear picture of my current location and my path ahead. I can glance at my watch and know exactly where I am. The course doesn't mysteriously turn and there is a clear celebration when I hit the finish line.  

When our oldest son Tyler came home for the holidays, we knew he was struggling. but we did not know how to help him. We have not been here before. A challenge of parenting is there is not a map to follow. We can be guided by our own experiences, but our parents did not have social media, technology, or a worldwide pandemic affecting their daily lives. We knew his path was not clear and he needed permission to zig zag. We let go of any map we had been following.

Here is what I have learned in the last two months. We can travel without a roadmap. We will get to the destination and might enjoy the journey if we take the scenic route. Make a pit stop, turn down a new lane, and stay a while in one spot. Coasting as it turns out, is a nice way to travel. 

A few times a week, I am Tyler's sous chef, absorbing anything he will share as he chops, dices, and sautees dinner for us. He is learning carpentry with a local general contractor, and perfecting his high school Spanish with the construction crew. Our communication flows smoothly, thanks to the guidance of our therapists. We only glance at the few days ahead, not the months or next season.

As long as we are getting a good night's sleep, spending time outside, and indulging in a dose of creativity, our days have a purpose. Together we are navigating on our own, no roadmap is needed.